Living In Hell On Earth? November 24, 2009

 

 

There is a lot of discussion in my head and among my support network these days about two proposals:  First, is that there is room for it all and second, that we must make adjustments as necessary.

 

 

The inroad into theses concepts requires us to observe with a keen curiosity.  We start by taking a look at how our body feels, what’s going on with the breath, what situation/environments do we find ourselves in, and that great solidifier, our emotional landscape… how do you feel?

 

In classes I say, “Observe the sensations of the body and make adjustments as necessary.” 

 

The whole idea here is that I will learn all the lessons I need in life by simply participating in earnest when I arrive at my mat.   Do I need to lengthen, bind, twist, or back out of a posture?  How might I manipulate the breath in order to find ease?  Where might I explore the edges?  These translate into real life situations at every turn. 

 

• Should I spend more time with these friends or on my own playing? (lengthen) 
• Ought I hold my tongue and listen? (bind) 
• Might I be flexible with my partner? (twist) 
• Could I be best served by removing myself completely or setting positive boundaries? 

 

Our most valuable lessons are learned when we apply the same discerning attitude that we have in our yoga practice to the every day happenings of our waking lives.  There is a certain integrity and a healthy dose of clarity & communication that is required in order for this to be a success.  We must get really honest about what is going on in our experience, and then adjust if, or when, it behooves us to.

 

A great example of this is my recent shift from the bright lights of Manhattan to the calm sounds of beachside Vero.  People ask me all the time, and often with unveiled wonderment and a touch of derisiveness, “Why Vero?” 

 

Seriously? 

 

Have you looked around today?  The weather is amazing, the beach is spectacular, and I am comfortable and loved in my beautiful home.  I have the privilege to work with an amazing set of yogis who want to play on a regular basis, a few close friends that are knitting themselves into the fabric of my life, I can ride my bike almost everywhere and without being taken out by a yellow cab, and I can sleep through the night without hearing the incessant sounds twelve million people outside my bedroom window.  

 

To be honest, I believe that when people are asking me “why Vero” (with that sound in their voice that implies I’m crazy) they are less interested in what brought me to this awe inspiring town and more interested in why the hell I left what they quickly describe in one way or the other as the “better” choice of NYC.  Um, excuse me, where did the contempt for where you live come from? 

 

To be fair, I understand not being jazzed about the place that you live in.  In fact, that is exactly why I left the city to begin with.  So in order to clarify here is an abbreviated answer to the question of “why.” 

 

After a little under ten years I found myself wanting different things.  My experiences in the big apple are ones that you couldn’t pay me a billion dollars to trade in.  I discovered a large part of who I am as a woman and found out that I am stronger and have more grit than I had ever given myself credit for.  I’d found myself in rooms that I thought had closed doors, got an education in areas that I didn’t even know existed in my youth, and with the help of a few outstanding mentors and friends I cultivated a greater sense of self, one that is balanced with an awareness due in large part to my yoga practice.  As wonderful as New York is and was, I just wanted something different.  Simply put, I saw that what I wanted to explore next did not exist in the environment in which I found myself and it was nobody else’s responsibility to make a change.  So I did.

 

Viva la Vero!!

 

I’m not suggesting that any discomfort is indicative of the need to make major changes.  What I am proposing is that it is important and necessary to contemplate and be inquisitive and to get real about what is happening in your lives and relationships.  Who are you?  Where are you?  Are you happy?  If not, get a grip and try something else. Knock it off with the disillusionment already.  My granny says, “shit or get up off the pot!”  A classier way to say it (though I’ve never been accused of being classy) is, “Just do it!”

 

 

What about the first point you say? 

 

Outside of a few basic agreements, we must approach life without judgment and expectation.  It is imperative that we relax ourselves and make room for it all.  As I type this, my tea guru Maria asks me if I mean this physically or metaphorically.  Both. 

 

If we continue to put ourselves, our families, partners, art, coworkers, god, friends, and strangers into boxes then we are strangling the fundamental gift that individuality offers.  If we shame others for living out loud or trying new things then we are sending the message that it’s silly to try or that they are unworthy of such self-expression.  It is almost worse when we afford ourselves this same level of contempt.  You have the right to exist and explore.  So do I. 

 

Relationships come in all shapes and sizes.  We are quick to define what others are engaged in so that we can be confident in how we respond to them.  If they are friends we treat them one way, if they are lovers or are married we treat them completely different.  Why is that?  Is it possible to approach each person as an individual and support their decisions to explore their lives no matter what shape and what twists and turns they take? 

 

I imagine the reason we are so hard headed when it comes to labeling is because it takes far less energy than to engage in the ever-changing reality of what actually is.  The biggest bummer here is that our attitudes of and reactions towards others is often based on assumptions.  There are a disconcerting number of realities and possibilities and we most often are way off the mark in our quick judgments.  Our rigidity cuts us off from embracing the beauty of life and love.  But I digress…

 

There is room for it all.

 

There is room to try new clothes, a new job, to express ourselves through art, dance, singing, surfing, or reading in the corner.  There is room for you to be committed to your partner and yet to have substantial friendships with others.  I can love my family and support them in their quest to live in the sticks and yet decide that for me a life in the bright lights of Paris is more appealing.  There must be room for that.  We need friends, companions, people who will listen to us bitch, we need a tribe, our families, we need strong support in our work endeavors, and we must have people who will sponsor us in our quest for artistic expression.  If we expect that all of these roles can or should be taken on by the same person then we are setting ourselves up for great heartbreak and disappointments.

 

It is important to take into account that we have no idea how our lives will play out or if we will even feel the same tomorrow about anything (most likely not).  If we have arranged our lives in a manner that requires nothing to bend or change and we show an unwillingness to do so ourselves then we will indeed be living in hell on earth. 

 

 

Gandhi said, “Be the change you wish to see.” 

 

I dare you to try.  Embody your beliefs, do to others as you wish them to do to you, take responsibility for your actions and happiness, support others with love as they endeavor to soar, make adjustments as necessary, and cut yourself some slack.  Nobody can dictate the course of your life and we should be humble enough and show great respect by not trying to control others.  I mean really! I have enough to think about… like what am I going to wear for my dinner date tonight.

 

 

ps: I love you ;0)

Gratitude Dude November 13, 2009

Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all the others.- Cicero 

 

 

As the holidays roll around, lights are being hung, talk of spirit and god abound, the theme music starts to blast from the speakers overhead, the temperature is dropping, flights are being booked, plans are being deliberated, and as all of us are feeling the gentle pressure of the coming winter obligations I would like to offer a single suggestion:  Cultivate Gratitude. 

 

That’s it.  

 

No matter what tradition you follow, regardless of your particular religion or community affiliations, I encourage you to take a moment and reflect on all the wonders of your life.  My dear friend and little sister makes a gratitude list for the Thanksgiving madness each year.  Last years brightly decorated sign offered gems like “avacado fat”, “sunshine”, “hugs”, and her choice for entertainer of the year.  As lists go, it was a compelling insight into the mind and gentle soul of this fiery eleven year old.

 

As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them.- JFK

 

In tribute to her idea I give you my list (that is growing daily) and hope that it in you may find some inspiration and real life examples of the blessings that surround us daily.  There is Abundance friends!

 

 

I am Grateful for my health, family, friends, the goddesses of Vero Beach, yoga, my mentor and friend Jonathan Fields, EA and her tribe, the new found relief of my hip thanks to Jill Jaynes, the Junior Leauge of Indian River County for their warm welcome and tenacity of spirit, coffee time at Cafe Mojo, Tea & Chi, funny people, the beach, guacamole, massage, the sound of the wind in the trees, the beach and all of her power, everything random, salsa night at La Fonda, the musical stylings of DJ what’s his name at Honey, time in NYC with my tribe, the great perspective small towns teach, lessons in happiness, time to contemplate, NPR, each and every breath, music (especially drums), critical thinking, ideas worth spreading, science, the stars, the sound of laughter, water, whole foods, unexpected adventures, kissing, a new pair of socks, reading time, the ability to change and grow, the space between the in-breath and out-breath, that my girl Kelly is Gone Again,   my fizzy bubbly, The Art of Non-Conformity, healthy relationships, eye contact, friendly trash-men who see colors, peach cobbler, countertop ovens, sprouts, ten fingers and ten toes, a gentle sigh, surprises (especially the romantic kind), old men and war stories, medina texas, well water, that they call me candy, and that there are those out there who play in the dirt!

 

 

Let us be grateful to people who make us happy; they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom.- Marcel Proust

 

Follow your heart.  

You are already complete.  

I love you.  

Smile.  Laugh out loud. 

Breathe deep.  

Enjoy moments together.  

Find a still place.  

Observe the sensations of your body, your breath, and your emotional landscape.  

Be hopeful.  Heal yourself.  

Practice Unconditionally.  

Liberate each other.  Hydrate.  Contemplate the spaces.  

Merge.  

Jump in feet first.  Don’t look back.  

Make fewer plans.  

Dream.  Vibrate.  Dance daily.  

Consume yourselves with passion.  

Be a woman of your word. 

Know your truth.  

Be Blessed, Be Bold, Be Loved.

 

 

Yama Mama October 29, 2009

 

 

Let’s begin our journey into the Eight-Limbed path of Ashtanga Yoga!!

 

 

 

Yamas, Universal Ethics/ Outer Actions, are the roots of our practice.  Correlated with the Muladhara (root) Chakra at the base of the spine, these principles guide the yogi by creating a strong foundation, self-preservation, grounding on the physical plane, health, prosperity, and security.  The Yamas are our liberation current and the path to transcendence and inspiration.

 

BKS Iyengar states that the Yamas are “eternal, irrespective of class, time, and place.  These great vows are non-violence (ahimsa), truth (satya), non-stealing (asteya), continence (brahmacharya), and non-covetousness (aparigraha.)”

 

• Ahimsa (non-violence) Withdrawal from all injury both toward the self and others.  Some modern yogis have interpreted this into a vegetarian & vegan diets as to not harm the animal kingdom.  Some interpret this as the rule of thumb when it comes to conflict resolution.  I tend to think of this vow as one of removal from injury in thought, deeds, both physical and mental.  This is the step that removes me from my desire to use shame and contempt or passive aggressive tactics towards others.  It’s a daily practice indeed.  It helps if I remember that there is a divinity that resides in each of us, and that we each came into this existence in order to live out our agreements with the universal consciousness. 

 

• Satya (truthfulness) Tell the truth.  It is easier to remember the details and though the truth is sometimes painful, we are not responsible for the reactions of others but to simply walk with integrity and speak plainly.  This vow also, as they all do, extends towards our relationship to ourselves.  Get honest about your motives, your desires, your aims, and your goals.  Strive to be a woman of your word.  Without truth there can be no friendship, without friendship there can be no true love.  Omission and half-truths count here too people so become mindful of not just what you say, but what you don’t.

 

• Asteya (non-stealing) There is Abundance!  There is more than enough to go around without you getting all uptight about not “getting” what you deserve.  It can be as simple as not trying to upstage your partner at a party because you need more attention, not being devious about the performance (and very often help) of your co-workers for fear that you wont get enough credit, not taking your roommates last serving of ice cream from the freezer, or being underhanded in general.  Old school yogis took the path of reducing their wants so that their inclination to steal to get all that stuff they “need” was removed completely. 

 

• Brahmacharya (continence/chastity) The ability to see the divine within each and every person without the arousal aspect.  To remove ones self from the desires of the flesh in order to calm the mind, listen attentively, create sensitivity.  It is a wise yogi that removes herself from the need to explore things outside of the necessities of life (which can lead to sorrow and increase the desire to act out because we didn’t get what we wanted).  The Tantrics have a slightly different bent on this particular vow.  They tend to practice chastity as the means to increase ones sensitivity in order to be in a state of righteous arousal that is intended for release with ones spiritual partner, which is done as a means of ritual and is believed to be the ultimate act of surrender to god and the joining of your divinity, your partners divinity, with the supreme divinity.  For the Tantrics everything is devotion (bhakti), including deeply intimate physical acts, which are to be celebrated  since the body is the temple of the divine.  

 

• Aparigraha (non-covetousness)  Thall shall not covet thy neighbors wife, or his house, his car, his bank account, et al.  Dude!  He’s got some baggage to deal with because of all that stuff so take a moment to breathe and let go of your desires for what neighbor guy has.  Here is the secret- that wife is sometimes moody, his house is in foreclosure, his car smells like puke from his two brat kids, and his bank account is having a hard time keeping up with all of his obligations, as amazing as you believe them all to be.  The message here is that the reality of any persons situation is always vastly different from what we believe it to be.  Be satiated.  Show gratitude for what you already have.  There is abundance, as we have already discovered, and as soon as you make the space the universe will send you your own laundry list of blessings (and the lessons that come with them)!

 

 

Take some time to meditate on these and see what bubbles up.  You may find a strong resistance to one or more, and that may be a great indication of where your maintenance should start.  If you follow a religious tradition you may find that these concepts have some accessible counterparts.  There is no correct order for undertaking these principles so work at your own pace and perhaps journal about your experience. 

 

 

There are grand lessons to be learned when we contemplate.  Greater still are the lessons we teach by our actions.  In thought and deed be pure of heart and allow yourself to be a bright white healing light.  Have the audacity to change and grow for the better.

 

Namaste-

Just Breathe October 19, 2009

 

 

In my opinion, Pranayama, the practice of manipulating the breath, lies at the very heart of yoga. It has the ability to Calm, Balance, Invigorate, Purify, and its benefits can be observed in the mind, the body, and in the energetic landscape.

 

 

Old school yogi masters taught that Pranamaya Kosha, the “conquest of the life force,” can be cultivated and directed through a variety of breathing exercises.  In fact, the breath is the only autonomic system that can be manipulated and harnessed and therefore serves as a powerful bridge between the Annamaya Kosha (the body) and the Atma Jaya (soul).

 

In his book, Light On Pranayama, B.K.S. Iyengar writes that the art of Pranayama, that is the participation in it as subjective knowledge, can lead to Peace, Poise, and Tranquility.  His student Yehudi Menuhin states that, “the irradiation of the human being with light and power, the very sources of energy [is what] in fact complete Einstein’s equation of matter and energy and translates it into the human, the living incarnation.”

 

I want in on that!

 

Just breathe.  I remember my mother saying that to me on more than one occasion.  It is what I tell my students and my contemporaries and this breathing business has become my main inquiry in the field of yoga.  

 

There are many techniques and modern science has been catching up with the ancients in providing illumination on how the process of breathing has such a powerful and positive effect on all of the systems of the body.  I won’t go into all the “hows” here but I will say that taking the time to practice just a handful of breathing techniques has already elevated my yoga practice in ways that has shocked and delighted me and I am starting to see the effects of this journey in many areas of my life.

 

Interested?

 

I believe that the foundation of your Pranayama practice is best laid on the groundwork of a confident exploration of three techniques; Ujjayi, Kapalabhati, and Nadi Sodhana.

 

• Ujjayi, or Victorious Breath, is a balanced inhale and exhale breath that sounds like the waves of the ocean.   Think about fogging up a mirror.  Breathing in and out the nose, allow the tongue to be soft in the mouth, and cultivate a gentle constriction in the back of the throat.  It’s as if you are saying the word “ha” as you breathe.  Almost like a deep sighing sound on both the inhale and the exhale.  This is the breath that I use in my Asana practice and the one I most often turn to when I need to focus, calm, and collect my thoughts.  It can be practiced without the sound too so that your coworkers aren’t left wondering why you sound like that creepy Darth Vader guy.

 

• Kapalabhati, or Skull Shinning Breath, is an invigorating breath that can empty the lungs of any stale energy and awaken the mind (it’s better than coffee folks).  I recommend trying this on an empty stomach as it can really stir things up in the mid line of the body and you dont want to blow chunks all over your fellow yogis.  This work is all about short sharp exhales.  Draw in a full breath, exhale to empty, inhale half breath, and begin to pump out the exhales through the nose.  The inhale will happen automatically here so just concentrate on the out-breath.  I usually do this in rounds of 25, 50, 75, and 100.  You will feel a pretty great buzz in your third eye and because of that this is a breath technique that has been successful in helping smokers kick the habit. 

 

• Nadi Sodhana, or Alternate Nostril Breathing is my favorite hands down.  This purifying breath is great tool to settle the mind for meditation.  Most often I teach this at the end of class before savasana but I have been known to start class with this dynamic option as a way to bring the class (any myself) to a place of great concentration.  Gently close your right nostril with your thumb. Inhale through your left nostril, then close it with your ring finger. Pause with the breath held in the body.  Open and exhale slowly through the right nostril.  Keep the right nostril open, inhale, then close it, hold the breath in, then open and exhale slowly through the left. This is one cycle. Often taught with ratios of inhale (x count), retain (x times two), exhale (x times three)  So it could look like this: inhale for four, retain for eight, and exhale for twelve.  Find a ratio that is comfortable for you.  Sometimes I let the counting go all together and simply inhale to full, retain as long as I can, and exhale a long slow breath all the way to empty.  There is room to experiment so I encourage you toward this end.

 

These are three great ways to start out on your journey.  As you practice I encourage you to observe the effects of each of these styles of breathing.  How do you feel?  What sensations occur in the body?  As you have questions search out your teachers for answers.  Be patient. 

 

As with any of the limbs of the practice of yoga, Pranayama is a powerful and worthy undertaking. I wish you success and as always- have fun with it.  

 

Much Love-  

 

 

Fall… in to love all over again! September 24, 2009

It’s Fall, my Favorite season!!

 

 

I’m back in action after an exciting month in NYC.  

 

For those of you who have asked about the details of my trip here goes:  

 

Vero to NYC via Delta, walk through the cloisters with my lizz, candlelight dinner with port/daniel/steve/and the bleeps and giggles princess, yoga with keith, lunch with johanna, class in the eve with someone who rocked my world, and an evening of art and laughter, coffee with lori, class with lori, touched base with jenna, laughed at jenna, dinner at some weirdo mexican food restaurant with a table full of crazies on a friday night, lunch with mj, workshop #1 at sonic yoga, drinks with yogis post mat-high, workshop #2 “tropical heat theme”, Y3 fashion show, Marc Jacobs show ( I saw Madonna and Lady Gaga), lunch with my dream-weaver/intuitive amber, Marc X Marc show (boots to die for), Narciso show (must have one of these dresses),  breakfast with krissy and olive june (my womb is still yearning), saw my ladies over at NBW (thank you for my life!), Proenza show, drinks with a blast from the past, Phi show (lots of leather), Calvin show (tasteful soft linens and interesting cuts), dinner and general cavorting with my buddy rob, lunch with lovers marco and julie, coffee with mj, dinner with dina (thanks for the glitter girlfriend), and a long friday night with mj and martin playing dress up, morning massage with master john, then off to the races for the last 36 hours in nyc with my dearest and nearest tribesmen…. and a u-haul trip 95 south to Vero Beach….

 

Now that I have landed I see that the beach is still beautiful, the birds and the bugs are vibrant, and unpacking my life has been like an extra holiday in and of itself ;0)  I am so thankful to be here, and if we have yet to meet, I am the girl that’s skipping through the streets and dancing on the beach!

 

There are some new classes to choose from, a yoga boot-camp, and some workshops that I am excited about in the next few months.  Check it out on the schedule page, I would love to see you.

 

Fall is the perfect time to reflect and make arrangements for the long winter months ahead. Clean the house, take a look at your diet, make some plans for your winter classes and to sit in stillness.  With that, I will be launching a community Meditation class soon so be on the lookout!  Let us share some space together and learn to tap into the deep creative energy and wisdom that resides within each of you.

 

Let me know what is going on in your life, how I may serve you, and when we are getting together next to play- 

 

In the mean time, be happy and healthy and try a headstand!

 

LOVE & LIGHT

Back To Basics September 1, 2009

 

 

 

Who am I?

 

Where am I?

 

Am I Thriving & Happy?

 

If not, then what Changes to I need to make?

 

 

Great questions all.  Someone really smart uttered these words to me several years back.  They stuck with me and any time I am feeling uneasy, or if there is an issue at hand that is weighing on my mind, I come back to them.

There are times when I get stuck on the very first one.  I look in the mirror, I journal, and I get back to the mat to discover who it is that I am.  Once I have a handle on that one, I find that the rest are much easier to tackle.

 

So lets break these down:

 

• Who am I?- Gender, age, race, religion, job function, title, relationship?  What is it that makes me, well, me?  And You?  When you break it down to the base level, what is it that you find/define?  Not so easy is it?  Or is it?  I know, so many  questions in a row…

If I am spinning in circles I sit and observe.  For me, it turns out that I find I am a living breathing human being.  I have feelings, memories, liabilities, strengths, and cravings.  I am a bundle of cells that exude an energetic pulse.  I AM.

 

• Where am I?- Checking out my surroundings I find myself perhaps in an apartment, on a boat, in a movie theatre, out in the park.  Where I am in space matters.  Today, I am in a beach side oasis under thunderclouds and an electrical storm of divine proportions.

There have been times where I have found myself sitting in the middle of twelve million people and wondered what the hell I was doing there.  Other times I have been known to show up in the middle of the woods staring down a wild beast with my heart in my throat from the exhilaration.  Where you are in space can have a significant effect on your quality of life, your emotional landscape, and the ability to check in with your higher self for signals or urgent messages.

 

• Am I Thriving and Happy?- What is going on in my relationships, my job, my social life, and with my spiritual journey?

The tropical heat here in Florida has an intense effect on the plant and animal life.  Everything grows.  It is Vibrant.  It is Thriving!  It all brings a smile to my face for sure and it causes the six year old giggles that are a beacon of happiness across the backyard.  Take a look at what is happening in the relationships around you.  Is there a level of communication and mutual respect that is necessary?  Does your job offer satisfaction?  Do you take time to hang out with your friends and blow off some steam?  What about your spiritual life… is there room for prayer and meditation?  Maybe you talk to god while you go fishing or sailing.  Make it a priority to attend to each of these areas for a well balanced life adventure.

 

• If not, then what Changes to I need to make?  If life is less than roses and I have taken the time to dig in to the questions above, more often than not, the answer to this question is more of a glaring declarative statement.

They may be small things like sprucing up your wardrobe, taking more time to lounge, or run, or make that weekly girls night out a reality.  They may be big ones like needing to move, or get a new job, or change your partner or group of friends.  Change for all of us offers and opportunity to put ourselves first and take responsibility for our life experience.  We are bombarded with the notion that it is selfish to put your needs above others, and in many ways I agree with that.  However, it is also a fault to be so concerned with those around you that you fail to take care of your needs and desires.  If you give all your energy away you will run out.  There has to be room for your relationship with your SELF.

 

 

You have permission to be heard, to express, to love, enjoy, and rage on in this life.  You have permission to dive in feet first with a heart wide open and see what this great Universe has the audacity to throw back your direction.  In fact, I dare you to go to the art supply store and stock up on some markers/glitter/paint/magazines/scissors/and construction paper.  Go wild and make a few dream boards.  If you knew you could not fail… If you knew you could have anything… If you knew that all you had to do was throw your SELF a party, invite your imagination, and manifest your true hearts desire… Would you do it?  Would you do it BIG?!!!

 

 

Go on…  I double dog dare ya!!!

Love Is In The Details August 23, 2009

 

I love Jasmine Tea.  

Nina, the lovely lady at The Sumo House, remembers this.

 

 

My mom knows that I love fingers run through my hair, dad remembers the sautéed mushrooms for dinner, granny prepares peach cobbler for every trip I make back to the ranch, my housemates have the almond nut milk waiting in the morning, and my lover remembers I take brown rice on my veggie roll…

 

These people love me.  

Love is often not about the grand gestures.  It is in the little things that accumulate over time.  

 

I know my best friend Tierney only wishes on stars and birthday candles and there is not another person on the planet I would dare to have a pancake dinner with.  Jonathan loves super dark chocolate, Johanna’s favorite color is blue, Lizz is a woman’s woman who dances her truth, Mia is in awe of anything Will Ferrell, Donna makes the best cookies on the planet, and Maria & Randy know exactly how the Macha should arrive.

 

We show each other love by noticing the things that are important.  In turn, when we go so far as to make those same things important, we cultivate a deeper relationship with the people around us.  Now I’m not saying that football is right up my alley, but I am saying that nothing tickles me more than watching dad and pepaw hollering at the boob tube on Thanksgiving.  It is after all a Texas tradition.

 

It is the simple things that we do and the traditions that we create that allow us to share an intimacy with each other.  It is this intimacy, this deep and abiding love, this non-judgemental affection, that we crave.  It brings us the peace and calm we all seek.  It is in the safety of a hug, the laughter over a meal, the cavorting on the beach, and the singing at the top of our lungs that draw us closer, that intertwines us.

 

It is this web, these threads of consciousness, that connect us on a spiritual level.  My out-breath is your in-breath.  Your in-breath is my out-breath.

 

Being attuned to the details is a sure fire way to show someone that you are trustworthy.  We tend to trust those who notice the details of our lives.  It catches my attention when it is clear that someone has been listening.  If I can trust you with the small things then I am more likely to start to trust you with the larger things (like my heart).  We test each other; don’t fool yourself into thinking we don’t.  We test, we observe, we adjust.  I will trust you, more so when you remember I like my Danish Green iced.  Trust is the foundation of Love.  Without it, Love cannot flourish.

 

• Love is patient- even though you are driving my crazy
• Love is kind- in spite of the fact that I had a crappy day
• It does not envy- I will show gratitude
• It does not boast- I don’t need to tell you how awesome I am
• It is not proud-  I’ll be humbled by the majesty of the Universe
• It is not rude- I can act with civility
• It is not self seeking- altruism is the application of love
• It is not easily angered- yoga breathing- full inhales and exhales baby
• It keeps no records of wrongs- true forgivness means letting go of a grudge
• Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices in the truth-we are, all of us, the Light
• It always protects- non-violence 
• Always trusts- there is room for it all.  nothing is taboo.  let’s not live with so many rules
• Always hopes-  confidence, integrity, & strength
• Always preserves- constant attention and cultivation

 

 

I encourage you to see the small importances around you.  To cultivate the trust that is nessesary.  Make that special meal, wear his favorite color, paint a picture of her favorite flower, play that memorable song, leave a secret note in their pocket, dance together under the stars and whisper those words that are sacred to just the two of you…  

 

 

Love each other.  It’s the small things friend.  In the details.

 

 

Be Blessed.  Be Bold.  Be Love(d)

My Start of Life Crisis! August 17, 2009

 

 

OMG!  Who is THAT?

 

 

That is what I thought when I woke up, stumbling into the bathroom, late night, sick with a headache, looking in the mirror three years ago.  I didn’t even recognize myself.  I was puffy, I had dark circles under my eyes, and I was racked with digestive problems stemming from sugar, gluten, and an addiction to cheese.  I was in a few relationships that rated bad, worse, and destructive.

 

Something had to change.  

 

It has been a long row to hoe my friends, but three years later I am happy, healthy, and down right vibrant!  How?  Well…

 

• I made lists.  Tons of lists of the things that I wanted and the things that I didn’t.  I had no idea who I was, what fired me up, or where the heck I was going.  Actually, I was not going anywhere, I was spinning in circles and lightening speed.

 

• I joined a support group.  I learned some tools that helped me to make better decisions and to see where my liabilities were and where my destructive patterns lay.  I stepped into a few new relationships with people who had my back, were one phone call away, and who understood that I was at the point of sink or swim.. and that I SO wanted to swim.

 

• I did yoga.  Lot’s of yoga.  Already a manager of a studio in New York, I went back to the mat and began to cultivate a daily practice.  This step was one of the hardest for me.  I was a full time teacher and I had a really hard time admitting to myself that I needed help.  I needed the guidance of other teachers, I needed to breathe, I needed, was IN NEED.

 

• I cried.  This is key.  Allowing myself to feel and to express was such a gift.  In fact, because I was encouraged to explore my emotional landscape on the mat,  I have become a teacher who encourages those in my class to make as much noise as possible! Grunting, Laughing, Sighing, Fluttering through the lips… It is all a simple way to remind yourself that you have the permission to feel what you are feeling and in turn you have permission to express those feelings.

 

• I slept.  It’s true, eight hours of sleep a day is essential.  Rest is vital.  You must make this a priority.  It was excruciating at first.  I would toss and turn.  I would pace.  I would get angry and I would some days give up and turn the lights back on.  Eventually sleep came easily and now I am an afternoon napper some days.  

 

• I read.  Anything and everything I could get my hands on.  Fiction, Non-Fiction, Comedy, Self-Help, Romance.  I took the time to let my imagination wander and in doing so my creative juices started to once again flow.  

 

• I got involved in a cause.  I found a mentor whom I believed in and I jumped on the band wagon.  I read his books, his blog, listened to him speak, I took notes, I watched, I listened.  I wanted what he had…

 

The common thread in all of these steps is action.  I wanted so much so fast.  It was hard to pace myself and there were some days that I wanted to throw in the towel.  I had a coming to Jesus meeting.  I meditated.  I went to see the Dalai Lama.  I burned candles, prayed in churches, sat in the park, watched films, walked around the museums, and eventually my mind cleared and a path emerged.  I took digestible simple steps.  I checked in with my support group daily.  I was reminded that I was worth it.  I played in the sun more and started to nourish and heal my body.  I listened to the still small voice within and made adjustments as necessary.

 

It’s been three years and I am living a life beyond my wildest imagination.  I have a beautiful home, a loving tribe, healthy food, time to contemplate, I still do yoga on a daily basis, and these days when I look in the mirror, more often than not, I know exactly who I am.

 

We are all works in process.  The road is not always easy or clear.  It is however just a road.  We all walk down our own versions and in the end we need to only feel like we gave it our best shot.  So, if you are in crisis, be it a start of life, a mid-life, or of the end of life variety… take it easy.  Day at a time my friends.  One foot in front of the other.  We are all in this together and I am here to cheer you on!!

 

Good Luck!  Carpe Diem!  Go Get Em’ Tiger!  RARW*

My Magnificent Manipura August 11, 2009

 

The Third Chakra- Lustrous Gem- 10 Petaled Yellow Lotus

 

 

Located: Solar Plexus

 

Element: Fire

 

Seed Mantra: Ram

 

Key Words: Power, Self Esteem, Vitality

 

Governs: Digestive System

 

Colors: Yellow & Gold

 

Excessive Traits: Anger, Hatred, Attention to Power or Status.  Try Passive backbends.

Deficient Traits:  Digestive Problems, Eating Disorders, Low Self Esteem, Feelings of Powerlessness.  Mid-Body Weight Gain & Storage.  Try Sun Salutations, Navasana, Warrior Postures, Twists and Deep Belly Laughter.

 

 

A well developed third chakra is what propels us, driving us toward success, it is our warrior energy, the power of transformation, the seat of our will, and that satisfying deep belly laughter.  Our storage battery.  It gives us the energy and courage to follow our intuition.  We have all seen and admired a dancer as they walk across the room, head held high, confidence brimming over, yet with the grace and dignity of someone who understands their value.  This is the beauty of a balanced manipura.

 

Sensible risk taking is one way of regaining our power and flexing our third chakra.  Get to your first yoga class, try a new posture, wear something different to work, experiment in the kitchen, ask for what you need.  You have permission to exist, to stand tall and to shine as bright as the sun.  In fact, each time you walk into a room, head held high, you give others the opportunity to see the divinity within and you give them permission to harness their own power.

 

I would suggest a simple meditation this week to connect to the flow of prana, life force, and observe it as it moves into the navel center.  In this meditation you will connect with that transcendental self, the part of you that experiences power and will beyond judgement and expectation. By cultivating the spiral energy of the third chakra, you will push past all concerns of liabilities and experience a connection to all that is.  

 

To begin find a comfortable seat, use props where necessary, with your back long, close your eyes and begin breathing deeply, think ocean wave, even inhales and even exhales.  

 

Feel yourself beginning to relax. Observe the sensations of your body, the mechanism of the breath, and the life force (prana) that is pulsing through you.

 

After about 50 breaths full of time, bring your awareness to your third chakra. Begin to breath deep into this area and feel an expansion in all directions. Each inhale conjures vibrant light, heat, and pulsing intensity.

 

As the prana builds, imagine a ball of golden spiralling energy. Experience this energy as it grows.

 

Begin to center yourself into this radiant ball of energy. Observe it growing deep in the body temple and then observe as the temple melts away and this beautiful energy begins to expand in all directions.

 

Observe.  You are One with Source.

 

Feeling a sense of deep connection to your surroundings begin to draw this healing energy back into the solar plexus.  

 

Let this energy flow through you and become a concentrated ball of golden light.  Within it contains all the vitality and carisma that you will need to move through space with dignity and grace.  

 

Slowly begin to open your eyes and draw yourself back to this very moment in time.  

 

You are Powerful.  Burning with the Universal Fire you are ready to tackle all obstacles with strength and courage.

 

Hara Om

Are you a Queen? August 3, 2009

 

India.Arie claims to be one.  Some days I do too.

 

 

 

 

Queen- a woman eminent in rank, power, or attractions  b: a goddess or a thing personified as female and having supremacy in a specified realm c: an attractive girl or woman 

 

Here are a few examples.  Women who refuse to live in the shadows of others.  Those who shine bright, have the audacity to speak their truth, who motivate, encourage, inspire, and protect.  This week see if you might spot a few queens of your own.  Perhaps look in the mirror and behold!

 

Cleopatra was the last Pharaoh of Egypt, and the last of the Ptolemy dynasty of Egyptian rulers. As she tried to keep power for her dynasty, she made famous (or infamous) connections with Roman rulers Julius Caesar and Marc Antony.

 

Chief wife of Pharaoh Amenhotep IV who took the name Akhenaten, Nefertiti is portrayed in realistic art of Egypt’s religious revolution initiated by her husband. The famous bust of Nefertiti is sometimes considered a classic representation of female beauty.

 

(1122 – 1204; France, England) Eleanor of Aquitaine, queen of France and England through her two marriages and ruler of her own territories by right of birth, was one of the most powerful women of the world in the twelfth century.

 

(September 9, 1533 – March 24, 1603; England)  Known as Queen Bess or the Virgin Queen, Elizabeth I ruled at a key time in England’s history, and is one of the most-remembered British rulers, male or female.

 

(about 497-510 – June 28, 548; Byzantium)  Theodora was probably the most influential woman in Byzantine history.

 

1755 – 1793  Queen Consort in France, 1774-1793, Marie Antoinette will forever be connected with the French Revolution. Daughter of the great Austrian empress, Maria Theresa, Marie Antoinette was not trusted by French subjects for her foreign ancestry, extravagant spending, and influence on her husband Louis XVI.

 

1819-1901 Queen of Great Britain, Victoria gave her name to an era in western history. She ruled as monarch of Great Britain during a time of both empire and democratization. She was married to her cousin, Prince Albert, for 21 years before his early death, and their children intermarried with other royalty of Europe and played major roles in 19th and 20th century history.

 

Then there is the list of the 100 most powerful women according to Forbes

 

The 25 sexiest women of all time according to GQ online

 

Finally on the list of fierce women we must include Dolly Parton, Alanis Morissette, Janis Joplin, Georgia O’Keefe, Joan of Arc, Madonna, Tina Turner, Ellen DeGeneres, Allison Janney,  Sissy Spacek, Olipia Dukakis, Sally Field, Kate Winslet, the list goes on an on and on…. Johanna Aldrich, Lori McAlister, Jennifer Whinnen,  Stacey Sperling, Annie Scott, Abby Sher,  Kelly Newsome, Lizz Furtado, EA, my granny, all the old ladies at my church… in fact the list includes every woman on the planet… 

 

That means you toots!

 

Walk tall, smile, laugh, dance, shake, squirm, pray, sing, and hug it out ladies- you are Amazing!!